Sparkle Farts

[agoodwinsmith]

I've been trying to think of something to do with glitter that is annoying but not dangerous.

I mean: people in Ottawa (and other Canadian cities) can't be chucking deck chairs off their balconies; and even raw eggs from a height would probably concuss and abrade.

But glitter should fall without becoming a particulate in the air, yes/no?

I suppose biodegradable glitter is not yet a thing, so microplastics entering the water system through city drains is not good.

Homemade confetti from compostable things?

Wheat (& other) flour is bad because it is combustible when loose in the air.

The thing about glitter, as anyone who has crafted with children knows, is that it is tenacious and reappears years after initial contact. If it is brightly multicoloured, it can be annoying now *and* annoying then.

I suppose there are dangers I haven't thought of, so this is no doubt a bad idea, but that doesn't mean I will stop thinking about ways to be annoying without being dangerous.

Comments

[jessie_c]

Break into the trucks and stuff the glitter into the air vents.

[armiphlage]

I was thinking caltrops, spike strips, or Czech hedgehogs, but the police would be able to act on those as obstructing traffic (although they have no issue with the KKKonvoy doing the same).

They've driven a long way, and their trucks must be dirty. How about we help them by cleaning their trucks off with squirt guns?

[jessie_c]

Squirt guns connected to the municipal fire-fighting system perhaps? And if the drivers happen to be in the way, well they need showers too.

[agoodwinsmith]

No caltrops or Czech hedgehogs (cute as they sound). Bad armiphlage, no cookie.

Also - currently in Ottawa they aren't moving.

Or they weren't - I hear something is up and that may change.

[agoodwinsmith]

Nono - no breaking in.

[sabotabby]

Glitter is not environmentally good. That said, glitter bombs have been and continue to be useful as a tool of psychological warfare.

Watching Twitter, it seems like bike barricades have been the most successful thing in protecting one's city from the fash. I don't cycle so I'm awaiting instructions.

[agoodwinsmith]

Some people even laid on the ground at the start of Burrard bridge.

[agoodwinsmith]

I just had another thought (I do that).

Someone who lays down in the street could coat themselves in glitter so that anyone handling them would get a dose of glitter. It was ultimately the police who removed the person laying down, so they would get the glitter, and if they put the person in a paddy wagon or back of police car, well, there would be a fall out of glitter there too, how unfortunate.

I think the glitter trail would be a mild rebuke to police - the only people they are willing to come to grips with are sparkle farts.

[sabotabby]

This is a good idea. I wish environmentally sustainable glitter would become more of a thing, though. I still have a glitter bomb somewhere that I never deployed because microplastics.

[armiphlage]

There are supposedly biodegradable glitters, but you are correct that they are still less than ideal.

https://greencoast.org/biodegradable-glitter/

[ranunculus]

The problem with glitter is that it can get in a person's eye where it is dangerous.

[agoodwinsmith]

Drat.